***Without darkness nothing comes to birth, as without light nothing flowers*** ∼ May Sarton
You cannot escape from the thought of your ex-boyfriend after a breakup. Losing your boyfriend implies that you have lost your best friend and companion. Thus, healing from such a loss is a challenge and takes a lot of time.
It will be more challenging if you were in a serious relationship or engaged. The reason being that everything that you come across will remind you of him. When playing your favorite songs, you will come across the song that he loves, triggering the moments that the two of you shared.
You keep asking yourself will he come back if I leave him alone?
When you are going to sleep, you tend to think of him and still wake up thinking of him.
You start to reflect on what you did wrong for him to give up on such a wonderful thing. Yet, you do not come up with a comprehensive answer. You start putting all the blame on yourself, ending up in a devastated state.
No matter how you try, you find yourself thinking of the last moments you spent together. Re-reading the conversation becomes your new norm. You end up skipping meals and stressed out the whole day.
You become sad and frustrated since you loved somebody who decided to leave you without looking back. You doubt your self-worth, and all you did to make him happy.
HOWEVER, you look back in the previous heartbreaks you had, and you do not want to go through the same.
Although he is gone, you do not want to give up on him. All you have left is mixed emotions and regrets.
You just want to turn time back and make things right. You are already obsessed with a person who wants to move on with his life. Should you give up on him or give him another chance?
How can you forget the person you used to talk to on a daily basis? The one you shared all your information with. You do not want to get into a new relationship.
Furthermore, the picture of your ex-boyfriend moving on with another girl makes you want to choke to death.
Earlier in the year, you were talking about making trips and living together. Now that is impossible, as you cannot even speak to him. You have traversed from being in love to single life.
You do not want to give up on the love of your life even though you broke up. After all, any relationship has its up and downs. At one time, you fight, and the other time, you are holding hands
Since you love him, you want to find a way to bring him back into your life. Nevertheless, you are stuck in a dilemma of letting him go or not. Can he come back to me if I leave him alone? Will he miss me if I do not check up on him?
So, if you are here because you feel like you’ve let that “special someone” go…
And if you’re interested in rekindling that chemistry…
Just click the button to learn how YOU can make your ex obsess over you again.
So, Should I Leave Him Alone Or Keep Trying?
The worst feeling on earth is living your life, picturing how it could have ended. However, if you keep asking “will he miss me or move on?”, the smartest thing to do is to trust your gut instincts. If you keep the distance, he may end up realizing what he has lost, ending up missing you.
Furthermore, if he was about to call you fiancé, he will probably notice that he cannot live without you. He will see that the fight is not worth losing the love of his life. At this point, talk about your insecurities and how to move get back together.
Therefore, after a break up, it can just be a matter of time before he comes back, begging for forgiveness.
If you want things to work out, do not be in haste to get back together. Take your time, but play your cards well.
To assist you further with such problems, we have come up with a list of how you can make up with your ex.
1. No contact period
If you want to get back with your ex, you must learn to maintain your distance. Remember that the no contact rule is about you and not your ex. This will rule will help you to stop being obsessed with him and focus more on you.
Will he miss me if I walk away? During this period, focus more on other things, to protect you from thinking of him. There will be many triggers that will make you miss him. Nevertheless, do not let him ruin your no contact rule. Stay strong throughout this period to help you overcome the lonely feeling.
Put in mind that this sacrifice that you are making will yield results that are more significant in the future. If you succeed in maintaining the role for one week, push your target further for a month. Continue with the same sequence until you notice that you can live without him.
After a month or so, you will realize that you can spend your life without him. Just wait until he calls or texts you. Knowing that you vanished without a trace, will bug him to death. He will wonder how or why you have not contacted him. Basically, if he loves you he will come back no matter what.
These questions will eat him up, and he will end up texting you to know how you are coping. Grab this opportunity and have a mature talk initiated by him. Try to come up with solutions to your insecurities and fears.
2. Never be friends with your ex
After breaking up with your boyfriend, the worst mistake you can do is ask him to be friends.
You do not expect to be friends with all the memories held by the two of you.
It is not easy to be good friends with someone you are mutually attached to. The best solution is to let him be and leave the rest to work out for itself. Just leave him alone when he pulls away. He will get jealous once he notices that you are leaving a joyous life. This will prompt him to come back to your life if he still loves you.
Keeping him around will only worsen the situation. You will end up getting hurt more and more each day that passes. With time, you can kick off as friends, but what you need to keep is a healthy distance. This will help you sort out your emotional problems.
3. Be extra careful with social media
Most ladies tend to ghost their exes on social media after breaking up. This is not the best way to deal with a breakup. It will make you look lame in his eyes once you post a seductive post on Snapchat, Tik Tok, or Facebook.
Your target audience will be your ex when you get on social media spree. Will it end up well with you?
Therefore, forget about posting hatred or sexy images on any social media platform. The reason being, once he sees the post, he will know that you are targeting him. Seeing your bitterness and jealousy will increase his pride since he knows he is the reason for your downfall.
Rise above such activities and prevent yourself from posting vengeance or petty tweets. The best way to tackle or deal with this is by posting your usual posts.
And if you REALLY want to succeed in renewing the most important relationship in your life…
And if you want him to feel that DESIRE and ATTRACTION for you again…
Then you have to watch this short video.
It will explain to you in detail how to make sure your ex DOESN’T FALL IN LOVE WITH ANYONE ELSE, and to ensure that he will come back to you.
4. Make a new friend
Making new friends will protect you from thinking of your ex. On a positive note, he will be jealous that you are having fun without him, causing him to miss you. Therefore, whatever the case, this is a win-win situation.
He will think about your new life and might end up contacting you. Furthermore, every man is always jealous of seeing his ex, enjoying life with new friends after a breakup. He will try to make sure that you get back together so that he can prove that he was special to you.
You do not need to get a new friend that you are interested in. You can pick a random guy who knows nothing about you and play your part. It is right to note that simple things matter a lot in a relationship.
5. Ignore him
Nothing gets a man angry, like talking over the phone when he is mad at you. He will want to know whom you are talking to and what you are talking about.
The best way of getting your ex attention is by ignoring him. As Corey Wayne always says the best way to get someone’s attention is to remove yours. This way, he will be worried if you have moved on or not. Ensure that you give him the silent treatment, even if you meet him accidentally. This will prove to him that you do not need him in your life.
Knowing men, he will tend to think of it and start missing you. Therefore, he will try to reach out to you and talk about your issues. However, do not expect to make up overnight.
Lower your expectations as it takes a tremendous amount of time to win your ex back. If you are meant to be together, then nothing can stop that from happening.
6. Cut him off completely
Ignoring him is a different thing from cutting him off. Will he miss you if you leave him alone? Living your life like he never existed in your life will make him reflect more of you. Thus, this will eventually make him miss you more than before. Cutting him off will give him space to do what he wants.
The best part of doing this is that he will only think of you and how to win you back.
You only miss the sun when it starts to snow. Therefore, losing you will make him realize what he lost.
7. Pretend you have moved on
Yep, I said it. In this scenario, you have to play the role of a don’t care lady.
Meaning, you have to pretend that you are happy, even though you are burning from inside.
Make new friends and post photos of you having fun. Prove to him that you can live without him.
However, note that you are doing this to win him back. Thus, do not post offensive pictures that might push him away.
Do this because you love him, and you want to get back together. Always remember that pretending that you have moved on can also have adverse effects. He can even pretend all is well and suffer in silence by pulling away from you.
However, we are all humans, so do not expect him to burn inside and see his loved one varnish with no struggle.
8. Do not EVER beg him to come back
Never make the mistake of begging him for anything. Give him space when he pulls away. Always note that if he wants to contact you, no one can prevent him from doing so. Do not lower your self for someone who cannot make any effort to win you back.
Remember that, if he misses you, he will try and contact you. You still have your pride to protect. Do not do anything that you will come to regret later. You are better than begging for someone’s affection and attention.
9. Keep yourself active and busy
The chances of thinking of your ex when you are busy are minimal, compared to when you are not.
You will indeed have short memory episodes of your past. But, they will always be rare when you are busy.
Enroll in new classes or hobbies to keep you distracted. This will play a huge part in protecting you from thinking of him, and you will find new things to do in your free time.
10. Take time after he contacts you
How many times did you cry after he broke up with you?
How many scars did he create in your life after breaking up with you? Was it easy for you after he went into the dark?
You should also do the same if you went through a hard time after breaking up. You need to prove to him that you can live without him. Therefore, next time he texts you, ensure that you take your time before replying.
However, always make sure that you reply, even though it is after some hours. Do not show him that you are suffering since you have broken up.
Life is short to live a sad and boring life. Do not cry because it is over; smile because it happened. Breaking up with your fiancé does not mean that it is the end of your life. Go out, enjoy, and have fun. If it were meant to be, it would be. It may be trite but it doesn’t make it less true.
If you want him back in your life, follow the above rules. Remember that, if your ex loves you, it will not be hard for you to convince him. However, it will be hard for you to get him back if he does not love you.
Always maintain your dignity and pride. Do not act desperate. There is no perfect relationship on this planet. We all have our difficulties, and we always try to stick with our loved ones.
But if you really want your man to COMMIT this time, you should understand this:
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